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The recent incident which has attracted international coverage between international performing artistes Rihanna and Chris Brown has given a prominent face to the scourge of domestic violence (DV). While we agree that DV is endemic in all countries and carves across race, colour, creed and even sex, sometimes it helps when famous people fall victim because of the attention it attracts.

Reports we have read suggest that both Rihanna and Chris Brown were members of households where they witnessed domestic violence. Psychiatrists often share the view that DV begets DV and it requires a strong will and sometimes professional help for victims to break the cycle. Rumours have been rife since last year that this is not the first time Rihanna and Brown would have resorted to embarrassing displays of behaviour in public when attempting to reconcile disagreements.

Yesterday’s press has reported that Rihanna will be making a public statement soon. There was a hint in the report that Rihanna will be speaking directly to the issue of DV. If she does BU believes that this is a big positive that would have come out of the sordid episode. Rihanna as a poster girl or should we say spokesperson for DV would go a long way towards raising the awareness level to this malady which afflicts all communities.

To paint a picture of the current level of DV in Barbados we thought we would post statistics, unfortunately we have not been able to find an authoritative source on the Internet. Even so the recurring comment about DV in Barbados is that known statistics are grossly understated. Many women it seems endure DV in silence. Mr. Ralph Boyce who heads up the MESA (forum to highlight the concerns of men) suggests that we have men who endure in silence as well. There is agreement though that women carry the burden of DV.

Of note is the knowledge that many of our social and support services are ill-equipped to adequately deal with DV. The police especially often treats DV reports as nuisance calls or alternatively with a heavy hand. The parties caught up in the cycle of DV require professional help.

As people who are not perfect, we expect that as communities we will have to battle with our imperfections until the end of time. Until that time comes we have to continue to educate our people about the implications of DV to sustaining a wholesome society.

To BU family members, when ever you suspect DV is present please ACT!


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  1. The Scout // March 11, 2009 at 7:05 am

    Beware of the Browns ; James Brown, Bobby Brown and now Chris Brown. I bet O.J.Simpson is related to them too.

    ******************

    Scout, you’re so right! I find it difficult to avoid the conclusion that all American black, men ARE N’T lunatics!! Have you lived there?? Have you known many black American men to prove to me that this is n’t true because they all seem mental, to me and you all wonder why I’m terrified about Obama being the President of the US. A nuclear power!!

    Whaloss!! I scared as hell boy!!

    And then, what’s all this business about returning a bust of Winston Churchill to Gordon Brown on his visit to the US the other day! Bad manners on top of idiocy!! It’s enough to make you despair!!


  2. Poor Mr Fenty must despair for his little girl!! He’s only showing the love and concern of a caring Daddy!!


  3. My heart bleeds for the brother!! He seems a reasonably, decent chap!!


  4. Hello 199, Sister B here, Just as a side not we the SDA came out of the Methodist traditon, our founder, Sister Ellen White was a Mthodist, and when she questioned Methodist doctrine she was expelled from that Chruch. The Methodist is really the Wesleyan Church, founded by John Wesley, anyway good luck and I hope to see you on that happy day.

  5. Partly bajan girl Avatar
    Partly bajan girl

    Quote 199;Party Girl’, I think the pentecostalists might be good for a good sing-along?!!

    Am I right?!! Not to mention a jump-up?!! 🙂
    ————————————
    Thats true. I have been inside a pentecoastal church in Barbados once.
    Quite fun:-)
    But why not pluck away all the christian “glam” and fully take back the old,indigenous beliefs of old Africa??
    It is in the mix with christianity that it has become insanity!
    Why not go out in the beautiful nature of Barbados and sacrifice some fresh coconutbread to our ancestors spirits?
    Sherish the beauty of the lush ,green nature and azur blueLordSea(yes,it s also God)?
    Pour some rum on our wise old one`s graves and write poetry about the beauty in the bajan`s faces reflecting the different tribes of Africa?
    Care for the nature of the islands, join together outside instead of inside a damp, dark church?
    Go back to the drums, play till the spirits are dancing in joy and tensed muscles andminds releases.
    And men; learn to see the beauty in all women, understand the divine in them and sherish them and we will ALL be gods!:-*


  6. I feel really sorry for
    Rihanna’s family, if she’s
    cut contact with them over this.
    Boys & lovers will come and go, but
    your Family is for keeps!


  7. Anonymous March 11@ 818 a.m
    Sister Baby
    You seem not to have comprehend my advice to 199. let me say it again, he or anyone else MUST want to have that closer relationship with their God first. Too many people today are just “church goers” and not Christians. What concerns me is how all these denominations are claiming that theirs is the right one and in the end the goal is the same, that is to be in the eternal presence of God. I don’t denounce any denomination, my hope is that everyone will seek that close relationship with the Father and he would guide you towards the one denomination that you are most COMFORTABLE with after you have visited a variety and analyse their operations and match it to your convictions. Note that I am NOT telling you to join a Methodist church or for that matter a SDA church. Just like the choice to become a Christian is yours, so too the choice about which church to join. What is MOST important is the join the Company of God’s family, whichever denomination that may be. God Bless.


  8. 199
    My Mother was the Ass. Pastor at a Wesleyan Holiness church, my Father the Ass. Pastor at a Baptist church, I used to attend both denominations. However, my girlfriend was a Methodist, she was a confimed member, I was not, so when we were discussing marriage, I did my research on methodism and it’s founder John Wesley and found that the cross over from Wesleyan Holiness was not hard. I must also admit that I was not at the time a committed Christian, my wife was and still is. We were eventually married at the Wesleyan Holiness and after I took my membership at the Methodist. one of the reasons is that I wanted my family to worship together. As I grew older and more matured, I find that close relationship with Christ and developed a bond with my God. Even though I feel very comfortable I still like visiting other denomination occasionally. I don’t discreminate and I’m always welcomed when I visit other churches including the Wesleyan Holiness and the Baptist. 199 seek that close relationship wiyh Christ and everything will fall into place.


  9. David
    I must apologise for changing the topic on this posting but I just had to get that off my chest.


  10. Back to the Rihanna blog
    I have some advice for the young lady. From out of most negatives you can seek the posirives, for you, I suggest you come out, tell the world that your recent behaviour of being with Chris since the incedent was under duress but you cannot continue in a relationship with a young man with such a violent temper. While you wish him good luck in the future, you let him know you are moving on with your life, even thougfh you still have loving feelings for him. Then be an activist for romantic violence and encourage other young people, including men to speak out against this behaviour. You, my dear, would gain the respect and popularity given to President Obama recently. The ball is in your court, this can be your breaking point. Choose you this day either self-respect or disgrace. The next move is yours, play the ball carefully.


  11. Scout

    Like you just wake up.


  12. Hi Scout, I see, I am sorry, I did misunderstand, also the reason I write annoymous sometimes is because I am at work. Have a nice night Scout.

  13. pray4 thischild Avatar
    pray4 thischild

    Rihanna’s friends fear Chris Brown will kill her.

    The duo hit the headlines last month after Brown, 19, was arrested for allegedly assaulting the Umbrella singer. Brown’s reputation took a tumble after a photo of Rihanna’s injuries – which reportedly included two “huge contusions” on both sides of her forehead, a bloody lip and bloody nose – found its way onto the internet. He was charged last week with two felonies.

    Rihanna recently rekindled her romance with the Run It hitmaker – and those close to the 21-year-old star fear the relationship will end it tragedy.

    A source tells In Touch Weekly magazine, “We have heard him yelling and getting so angry with her since the whole thing went down.

    “We are all scared for her and think he could even kill her.
    Rihanna’s Friends Fear Tragedy

    “After Chris’ arrest, Rihanna admitted to friends that it wasn’t the first physical attack.

    “She said it’s been going on for months and it has gotten worse.”

    http://www.crooze.fm/showbizz/gossip/rihanna-chris-brown-together-just-not-in-public-021872.html
    Rihanna & Chris Brown: Together, Just Not in Public


  14. Hi Sister Baby, and thanks for the additional info at 09:38, yesterday! However, my love of meat rules me out of possible admission to the SDAs! Nonetheless, hope that god will forgive me and that we will meet in heaven on that glorious day!! See you then, sweets!!

    ‘Partly Bajan Girl’, de only nature dat I gun commune wid is a nice, Bajan-chick and, hard as I try, I caan fine one, nuhway!! Accordingly, the only other communing I’m going to do is with god and, like me, his followers, on a Sunday, when I finally decide which church to join! Thanks for the advice, though!! As for Africa!! Where is dah, dear!! You clearly don’t know them!!

    Scout, do you have any doubt that I DO, WANT “to have that closer relationship with god”?!! Why then would I be asking all these questions?!! How can I prove it to you?!! 🙂

    Scout, I recall that at a very young age of about 23, working with a guy who was training to be a catholic priest and his swearing to me that catholicism was “the only true faith” so this having a greater belief in your own faith is nothing new!!

    However, I’m inclined to think that one must be right and the other wrong, or more right than the others! It’s difficult to comprehend how so many different faiths can all be right, at the same time!!

    *******************

    199 seek that close relationship wiyh Christ and everything will fall into place

    ********************

    Scout, you made me laugh, there!! That’s sounds like a typical Bajee speaking alright!! Scout, who knows my bro!! You might well be right!!

    Scout, we’re still ‘on-topic’!! Rihanna might well be a christian for all we know, and I, most certainly, am, as are you!! David understands!!

    *******************

    “Then be an activist for romantic violence…………”

    *******************

    Scout, I take it you meant “for romantic LOVE”?!!

    Sister Baby, how’re things in Guyana these days? Do you see an improvement? I know that you had a major problem with flooding, and, when’s your next general election and what do you see as the prospects for your country??

    Bonny will be particularly keen to know your answer to that one as she’s especially keen to see the Guyanese leave Bim!! She was so rude to you, yesterday!! Sorry about that!!

    As for Rihanna, I seem to be having more and more difficulty seeing her videos on the box, these days. It’s as though she’s secretly being black-listed!! It would be such a shame for this beauty to ruin her career because of some idiot!! Anyway, as I showed you yesterday, they propose to record a song together so, maybe, all is now well?!!


  15. 199
    I DO believe you want that close relationship with your God. Shut yourself away from anyone else, prayer in secret, pour out all that you want to cleanse yourself of before God. Weep, laugh, shout, do whatever helps you to relieve yourself of the impurities within you (sin). I can assure you that once you’ve done that you will feel refreshed. From there listen to that “still, small voice”, that will give you guidance. My Bro it is then that you know you are in a close relationship with your God. Joining a church will then become automatic, after visitation to a variety of denominations, that voice will tell you the choice to make. Don’t depend on me or anyone else, the choice is yours, with help from your God. Go in peace my Bro and may God go with you.
    ===========================
    As far as Rihanna is concerned, she too needs to seek devine intervention. She is travelling down a MOST dangerous road and is about to be involved in a head-on crash. She needs to step out of the fast lane, re-organise herself and steer her life in a new positive direction. I wish her well. Most of Barbados is hoping that she allows her head to over-rule her heart.


  16. Everybody!! Emergency done!! Apparently, Rihanna was seen out on the town, last night, having a jolly good time with her friends, so we call all guh back home, now!!

    Laaaaaaaddddddddddddddd!!!!

    http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/usa/article2313783.ece

    Scout, thanks for the advice!! More anon!!


  17. Do we need a person who diss parents and government for which she is technically employed, for a stupid american thug, as our Youth Ambassador? The alternative is that she would turn her head against Barbados and take American citizenship. So what? if this is the way she wants to go, let her go, she would reap her reward. Obviously, her handlers have more say over her life than her parents or government, she was forced under duress to do what they wanted to save the young thug’s career. He has now promised to pay her 7 mil pounds sterling if he as much as squeeze her arm again. The carrots are dangling above the “small island” girl but who needs that money when you’re dead. The beneficiaries? her handlers and Chris Brown indirectly; STUPID GIRL, you make me shame. Where is your PRIDE and INTEGRITY? Think for yourself, you are just being used like a pawn on a chess board. The problem is Chris, his mother and handlers never expected it to escalate to such worldwide news, now he is trying to save face but he don’t care anything about that girl, he’s just interested in his career. Strip the girl, she’s not a good example of a Barbadian Youth Ambassador. What advice can she give to our youth. Even our youth are dissing her and the government is lingering on the decision to remove her as Ambassador. The youth is seeing Double Standards. There is one standard for ordinary youth and another for celebrate youth. I’m solidly in the young people’s corner this round.


  18. David
    It seems you too are under duress as far as Rihanna and comments about her is concerned. Where did I make the comments that you are rejecting?


  19. 199
    How was I rude ta Sister Baby yesterday? You hate a war but love a battle. Wah I do now?
    Still luffs ya doe. You cud ‘diss’ me or not fa Sister baby.


  20. 199
    Ya ‘struction-mekka.


  21. Hi Bonny, sorry, it was n’t YESTERDAY when you were so rude to Sister Baby but on the 10th, reproduced here!!

    ***************

    Sistser BAby,
    Your church should pray that life returns to normalcy in GT so that all dese GTbanna could stop invading my 166sq. mls. like flies pun shit. You ever draw that to your church’s attention? I doubt. Dat is another holistic approach.

    ********************

    That is soooooooooooo rude!! Rather like the ZR man you told us about!! 🙂 As I suggested at the time, “is that the way you speak to a guest in your home?” (Barbados)!!

    ZR, I love sweet black women, no matter where they’re from! However, I’m trying to decide who’s the nicer, you or Sister Baby?!! So far, SB is winning – just!!

    It’s up to you to represent the Bajan women to me as I have n’t had one for a very long time!!


  22. Should be “Bonny, I love sweet black ….

    Got ZRs pun my mind!!


  23. Scout, re: Rihanna being Youth Ambassador!!

    Is your lord a forgiving lord!! That’s a difficult one, is n’t it!! in these circumstances!!


  24. 199
    Let’s be serious; too many people believe that they can deliberately do as they like and then ask God to forgive them. Why should I believe that God would forgive Rihanna unless she is remorseful and ask for such forgiveness. God is not like man that would gloss over something bec


  25. If Rihanna covers up for the wrong of some-one else, then she is just as guilty. You think God would simple forgiveher without her genuine plea for forgiveness just because she is a “celebraty”? We are all equal in his sight. What Rihanna has to do is be at peace with herself first


  26. RIHANNA,BROWN CAMPS DISAGREE ON PHOTO OPS: Chris’ people reportedly want couple to be seen together; RiRi’s folks say it’s too soon!

    http://www.eurweb.com/story/eur51578.cfm

    Chris Brown is clearly using Rihanna to revive his career, after the battering.
    He is trying his best to tip off the paparazzi off with photo ops
    of them lovey dovey and together to improve his aggressing woman beating image.

    Where are her handlers? Her career with crash and burn over this selfish boy!


  27. 199
    ‘So far SB is winning-just”.
    I just got ta visit de obeah man and all will be well. Ya tricksta.
    ZR is all ya got pun ya mind? Ya sweet devil. (smoochhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)


  28. Bonny, I was thinking this morning it’d be interesting to know the story of your life and whether you’ve lived abroad and whether it changed your view of anything, or, if you have n’t lived abroad, whether you think it could change your outlook on anything?? Care to tell us! We know about SB, that I live abroad, and one or two others but hardly anything about you!!


  29. mike
    You’re so right, Chris is just sponging on that girl to re-start his career. The problem though is, the duet they are doing together, will not do it since his fans can see through all this. His song that was on the Top 100 charts has fallen off entirely from # 14 when the incedent occured and Rihanna’s is now feeling the squeeze since it is reported that she has gone back with him. Even her friends and other singing and movie stars are dissing her for her decission, plud Diddy is also getting some stick for allowing them to use his house for the publicity. The Big question being asked is “where is Rihanna’s parents? why are they barring her parents from her? The big question I’m asking ” where is the Barbados Government in investigating their Youth Ambassador and if necessary protecting her?” We the Barbadian piblic should be asking these questions to protect our image abroad. It is obviuos that this young lady is under seige and in that business she could be in grave danger.


  30. From reports coming out of the USA, parents areinsisting that their teens diss Brown for his beating of Rihanna and Rihanna for going back with him. These two individuals were the “darlings” of the american youth and their parents because they appeared to be “so clean” that parents wanted their young sons and daughters to be like them. Now all this has changed, first Chris was dissed for his behaviour but Rihanna was seen as the abuse victim and was even more loved after the pic of her was reveiled. Now that she has alleged gone back with him, she too as been dissed for that move. Stupid girl, she has ruined her career over a thug who is just using her to restart his, then he will beat her again and worse next time.


  31. Scout you dont have my support when you go down the Hitler/ Idi Amin route with Indo Guyanese but you on the button with Rihanna. No sense business or otherwise can be made of her decision to immediately run back to Brown ra**h**e. The girl career and millions of $ at stake. Cant she and whoever advising her understand that. She letting down the famous Bajan common sense and pragmatism.

    Even if she is dangerously in love with the serial woman abuser cool it until things blow over. That way she keeps her fans and role model status . Later she can lay on a pr offensive as to why she reuniting with the woman beater. By then with a bit of luck Brown would be in the pen with a female nickname.


  32. Anonymous, thank you for the link. Maybe Brown IS winning the public-relations campaign over this incident, afterall!!


  33. Anonymous/199
    That’s what I’ve been saying, the stupid girl has allowed herself with help from Chris money hungry mother, to be the fallgal, so as to benefit both Chris and his mother. All this is being done at the expense of her own career, with the hope thar Chris stays with her. That is soooooo pathatic, it hurts me to think that she’s a bajan. I thought I would have never say that but her parents need to rescue her quickly and if necessary bring her home and give her a good bajan cut-ass to beat some sense into this immature little mind she is protraying. She is also a disgraceto Caw’mere.


  34. Clearly, you feel very strongly about this Scout, and her remaining Youth Ambassador for Bim!! Do many Bajans feel similarly and is the PM aware of your feelings!!

    Scout, she’s too old now, to “give her a good bajan cut-ass” plus, that would really make Barbadians look ridiculous in the eyes of the world!!

    I doubt there’s much more we can say about this one until the young dears make their next move and allow us to know whether they’re really going to stay together or part!!

    If they remain together, horrified as I would be, and, difficult though it would be, as long as she continued to make such beautiful music, I’d still continue to love the lass as I love her for her music! I’m afraid that I think she’s so good at that I’d be prepared to forgive her almost anything!! If Michael Jackson can survive a battery of child abuse allegations and charges then our girl might also be able to survive a temporary dip in popularity! Only time will tell but I wish the gorgeous babe, all the very best!! Still hope she’ll dump the punk, though!!


  35. Rihanna May Lose Deals With Popular Brands for Taking Chris Brown Back
    http://www.aceshowbiz.com/news/view/00022762.html

    There She blows !
    Here comes the Fallout
    Gucci is bailing out, Covergirl will
    probably dump her too!

    Revlon is running an online survey asking if Rihanna is an appropriate spokesperson for their Covergirl line.
    http://blogs.villagevoice.com/music/archives/2009/03/classy_revlon_a.php

    Who wants to employ a self avowed Chris Brown Punching Bag – while representing Their Brand
    Internationally in these tough economic times?
    They know that will lose money every timeChris Brown decides to beat on her & when She need to go to into recluse until her visible wounds & bruises heal.

    Rihanna has allowed them, to successfully manipulate her love sick mind to mash up what could have been lucrative career over a love affair with immature abusive boy.

    I saw an Covergirl commercial on the
    television the other day, I could not help
    but think that this could very well be the last one be aired on the TV.

    She’s such a pretty girl but has no
    real business sense at all! Her
    Handlers have failed !!!
    What an empty head!


  36. Has Rihanna Scandal Damaged Cover Girl Brand? http://adage.com/article?article_id=135249

    Chris Brown will
    probably walk away scott-free
    from charges after actively
    undermining and wrecking
    this young girl’s image and career
    & Rihanna’s silent, bumbling handlers will not hold Chris Brown financially accountable for it.

    They need to sue his accounts & recoup her endorsement & concert tour financial losses during this violent episode! Yes Chris Brown bought her a
    tawdry reconiliation bracelet,after beating her upbut? She may have to pawn it soon to stay afloat!

    Young Women Take note,
    try to be more intelligent
    & don’t let a cougar’s turned out
    aggressive little “boy-toy” ruin Your whole Career !

    Be smarter than Rihanna Girls,
    Love & Money do not Mix !

  37. Wayne (London) Avatar

    Rihanna’s catapulted rise to ‘superstardom’ has been kaleidoscopic. Just on the cusp of her secondary school career, she was ‘released’ to enter and to pitch her wagon into the world of the fame,and, almost overnight, she became an internationally-recognized celebrity.

    Inclined towards being conservative, I was concerned about her vulnerability, noting the general teenaged tendency to be unfocussed and gullible.

    Admittedly, Rihanna does have talent (no denying that!). She is beautiful, her performances are energetic and fun.

    But what has been revealed lately in Rihanna’s personal life/w. Chris is a young lady who still is in crying need of guidance. Her parents seem to be at a ‘lost’ as to how to help her and it appears that they have failed to impart to her the Godly wisdom and example she so desperately needs.

    Could you pray for Rihanna?


  38. She is sending a bad message indeed. Chris Brown is old enough to know NEVER to hit a woman and she is old enough to leave him. End of story.


  39. Вот что-то похожее у меня уже год из головы не выходит!


  40. […] the Chris Brown incident it seems Rihanna has been on a hunt for publicity by any means necessary. We understand these PR […]


  41. So sad . so many Spam Comments here.


  42. Вполне возможно. Иногда так действительно случается.


  43. […] Of course 2009 will be remembered by Barbadians as the year when an American lout Chris Brown beat Rihanna and left her battered and bruise. It was a moment in the career of Rihanna when Barbadians […]


  44. Hello, Very good article. I will continue to pursue this article, as it is written is very interesting. Since we are interpreted very much on good information. Best regards 🙂


  45. A hostage is taken hostage, and thus a prisoner. When a beautiful woman is enstellt is certainly damaged.


  46. I feel so sorry for her even though i did want them to break up so sorry babe but i am happy that he dumped you

  47. Autoentsorgung Avatar

    This is a very good idea to write such an article. I’m sure the blog to pursue. Thank you very much


  48. I feel so sorry for her good jod he dumped her for whot he done


  49. I feel so sorry for her good jod he dumped her for whot he done

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