est. 2007

Barbados Underground

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Fathers Fighting Back Against Spiteful Mothers!

The following note was sent to the blogmaster. Somewhere in Barbados land there are men fighting the good fight to have access to their children. The process is being frustrated by spiteful women- David, Barbados Underground Imagine even the schools now saying they have received instructions that they cannot even show  the fathers the school…

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The following note was sent to the blogmaster. Somewhere in Barbados land there are men fighting the good fight to have access to their children. The process is being frustrated by spiteful women- David, Barbados Underground

Imagine even the schools now saying they have received instructions that they cannot even show  the fathers the school reports of their children per instructions from Ministry Of Education.  David, no wonder men are giving up in frustration and are absent from the lives of their children in great numbers for the oppression is real.

You can rest assured I will not give up fighting- politicians don’t care until its an election. Its disappointing but not surprising that the ‘balls’ of the 25 men in parliament are missing for they seem afraid to offend the radical feminist. Perhaps if the voter turnout was more men than women the self serving politicians would speak to the emasculation of the male and the issue of fathers who wish to support their children being denied access.
Have you noticed that more men in frustration are going before the law court for lashing out at their child-mother over access? Just hoping it does not get worst for many  men are reporting to me they are feeling hard done by the system.
Please find attached the comprehensive report by the UN Child Advocate Mrs Faith Marshall Harris with its modern recommendations for the Maintenance & Minors Act such the provision of maintenance in kind.
Linear Thinking Kills Innovation!

48 responses to “Fathers Fighting Back Against Spiteful Mothers!”

  1. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    The problem with men being denied access to their children report card stems from the fact that these men would not go to court, and fight for full or joint custody … Or visitation rights…

    Because I fail to believe that if a man goes to family court and fights for his rights regarding his child … providing that there was no prior sexual, emotional, psychology, physical, and financial abused involved in the relationship that he will be denied access to his child’s report card…

  2. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    David

    It is sheer nonsense to believe that if a man is awarded joint custody that he will be unable to access his child’s report card and his former lover would have access to it solely… which court does a thing like that …? Not even the kangaroo court does a thing like that….

  3. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    David

    If the fathers aren’t paying their child support consistently, then I totally agree with the Ministry of Education, but if they are paying and are being denied access to this right then something is seriously wrong here…

  4. David Avatar
    David

    If you do not know what plays out in Barbados regards how court orders are routinely disregarded then shut up. Are you not reading what Kammie is saying or are you happy to resort to generalizations.

  5. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    David

    What plays out in Barbados has little to do with a man who going to court and fighting for his rights as a father providing that he has his affairs in order…

    So David Kammie is essentially, saying me and others that if a man is awarded joint custody in Barbados by a family court that the Ministry of Education can then prevent him from obtaining his child’s report card? It is that what Kammie wants us to believe?

  6. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    @”11. Recognition that child support, vital to the wellbeing of children and for the alleviation of poverty, includes basic food and shelter, services (for example, child minding), education, training, school books and uniforms, medical attention, medication and insurance. ”

    I would add here recreation. I believe that a child has a right to some recreation, school fairs, etc. and deserve some little money from their parents, according to the parent’s means for such activities.

  7. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    David

    You would think that if men are being denied the right to their children report card that they would ask the judge to put this in the divorce decree or as a stipulation for paying child support…

  8. Wily Coyote Avatar
    Wily Coyote

    @Lexicon

    Follow what David said “court orders are routinely disregarded” , CORRUPTION invades all aspects of Bajan life, the term endemic comes to mind.

  9. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    Wily Coyote

    If court orders are routinely disregarded in Barbados … then where is the backbone of the Barbadian people to stand up demand better? In thought the power was in the hands of the governed?

  10. TheOGazerts Avatar
    TheOGazerts

    “Imagine even the schools now saying they have received instructions that they cannot even show the fathers the school reports of their children per instructions from Ministry Of Education.”

    Somethings strike me as so wrong that I must suspend my haste to comment and ask the blogger to add more detail for that sentence.
    Thanks very much for providing such a useful link. I think the writing style is well within my level of comprehension and therefore that of the average Barbadian.

  11. David Avatar
    David

    What does it take to have cases heard?

  12. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    @ Lexicon, here is a serious matter and you persist with your RH drivel. Thanks though for not referencing the USA.

  13. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    @ lexicon, your 8:07 comment shows some improvement.

  14. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    @Simple Simon, I was waiting on you, guess you’re still half asleep.

  15. Mariposa Avatar
    Mariposa

    There is more to this story than meets the eye

  16. David Avatar
    David

    You know this how?

  17. Mariposa Avatar
    Mariposa

    Hard to belive that the Ministry would get itself all tied up in family problems which can all by themselves lead to law suits against the Ministry (unless ordered by the court)
    This story has missing pieces hard to belive if not properly put in it’s right context
    As a parent paying child support the Ministry denies me acess to my child information without court order Ministry to do so
    I would head straight to a lawyer for resolution

  18. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    @whiteHill March 4, 2019 8:17 AM “@Simple Simon, I was waiting on you, guess you’re still half asleep.”

    Nah.

    Got up before the sun. Lolll!!!

    I am fully supportive of BOTH parents being FULLY engaged in the raising of their children. Both parents giving generously of love, time, money, spiritual guidance, moral guidance, recreation etc.

    If you and I don’t agree on anything else. I believe that we can agree on this.

    All of our children deserve the very best.

    Agreed?

    A very good and a very happy day to you.

  19. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    I was the beneficiary of really, really good parenting. An excellent mother. An excellent father. I wish the same for every child. Two sweet and loving grandmothers. A grandfather, a little distant and stern as 19th century men were, not huggy-huggy, but at heart a really good fella. He was a shopkeeper, and his shop was right next to my school, so you would understand, fishcakes galore, ice-cream blocks everyday!!! Sweet. Lolll!!! Wonderful aunties, and uncles and cousins too. In effect all the love that every child deserves.

    The other grandfather died before I was born.

  20. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    Picked some small tomatoes/cherry tomatoes this morning. Saving these for the neighbours at the end of the gap.

  21. de pedantic Dribbler Avatar
    de pedantic Dribbler

    David, with respect bro but surely u are being a tad harsh re @Lexicon’s valid posts (which frankly are not bare generalizations ) and too the retort from Mariposa….on this point I can suspend my normal disbelief at their often incredulous posts and agree completely with them.

    Regardless or rather because of court orders being disregarded this matter should be pushed to the limit by any aggreieved and disadvantaged father- here one assumes they are 100% above board on all fronts as noted above.

    But let’s step back…is this NOW an issue (parental problems with children) or rather now a hue and cry because of the power of social media and of course the ‘alpha’ activism and in-your-face independence of females… otherwise called feminism!

    What struck me in one of the statements from Mr Holder was “Have you noticed that more men in frustration are going before the law court for lashing out at their CHILD-MOTHER over access?”

    Double emphasis on the caps…not being rude or personal but I’ll ask these questions about our society: if that caps was ex-wife would the issues be as severely unresolvable before the courts?

    If we know we are dealing with more independently aggressive, alpha- minded females are we not more duty bound to carefully thread when the impregnation decision is being made?

    I get it that the best of love and devotion can turn bitter (boy do I get dat) but we can’t look at these Bajan issues as if they are some unicorn developments…we men have abused our ‘dominant’ role for ages and we are now faced with some very powerful, some angry and even some spiteful women who are taking their pound of flesh and then some…fact still seems and lost on them that the real victim here is the child!

    So it’s back to that term “child mother”…seems so blunt and lacking intent of family, togetherness and understanding the gravity of PARENTING… but heh it is what it is!

  22. David Avatar
    David

    @Dee Word

    You obviously have no idea what it takes to have cases heard. If you want an urgent matter it costs money. Do not trivialize how difficult it is to manage a case, any Rh case, in our court system.

  23. de pedantic Dribbler Avatar
    de pedantic Dribbler

    Yes and no David…absolutely I know that it takes resources (precious work time, money, and who u know) in our beautiful Bim when going before the courts…but no I absolutely do not see how that alone validates this overall situation.

    Mr Holder may have a very bad situation and be a victim of a tyrannical set of court officers even but no one is trivializing this matter in it’s entirety !

    Family court issues are always contentious as lots of lies are laid as fact and can may life very difficult … But let’s not take that and generalize it either.

    Lata.

  24. David Avatar
    David

    @Dee Word

    If you do not know allow those who aware to speak.

  25. GEORGIE PORGIE Avatar
    GEORGIE PORGIE

    RE @Dee Word

    You obviously have no idea what it takes to have cases heard. If you want an urgent matter it costs money. Do not trivialize how difficult it is to manage a case, any Rh case, in our court system.

    YOU MUST FORGIVE THE IGNORANT BOVINE EXCREMENT OF THIS NUMBSKULL WHO SPEAKS THROUGH HIS SHELVES OF HOUSTON

    THE COURTS THEMSELVES ARE AGAINST THE MEN—-EVEN MALE JUDGES

    THERE WAS A TIME THAT A HIGH COURT JUSTICE USED TO COLLUDE WITH AN EVIL JAMAICAN LAWYER AGAINST MEN IN THE HIGH COURTS

    THIS WAS TOLD TO ME BY A COURT OFFICER ONCE………..THEN I SAW IT FOR MYSELF!

    I HEARD A FAIRER JUDGE ASK THIS SAME NASTY JAMAICAN WOMAN ” ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME THAT A MAN CAN NOT ENTER HIS OWN HOUSE NOW?

    AND WHEN YOU WON A JUDGEMENT IT GETS HELD UP IN THE COURTS FOR OVER 20 YEARS

  26. Mariposa Avatar
    Mariposa

    To the devoted parent trying to get acess to the child’s information
    The cost becomes secondary
    In the meanwhile a Ministry would be drag into a family dispute that ministry has no reason for being involved
    Think of the social media backlash involved all pointing in the direction of the Ministry
    Not good

  27. GEORGIE PORGIE Avatar
    GEORGIE PORGIE

    AS FAR BACK I HAVE HAD YOUNG MEN- SEVERAL YOUNG MEN- COME AND SIT BEFORE ME BROKEN AND WITH VERY HIGH BLOOD PRESSURES

    I KNOW OF A CASE WHEN A MAN LAY ON HIS BED AND HIS WIFE PUSHED HIM OFF, AND BY THE TIME HE COULD RISE FROM THE GROUND, SHE HAD RETRIEVED A KNIFE FROM UNDER HER PILLOW

    SHE HAD BEEN ADVISED BY HER LAWYER AND FRIEND TO CALL EVER POLICE STATION AND PROCLAIM THIS MEEK MAN TO BE A WIFE BEATER, WHICH HE WAS NOT.

    PRAISE GOD HE WAS ABLE TO WALK AWAY AND NOW HAVE A CARING AND LOVING WIFE WHO ADORES HIM

    I KNOW OF A CASE WHEN A MAN LAY ON A BED DOWNSTAIRS AND WOKE INTIME TO SEE HIS WIFE WITH FIRE TO SET HIM A FIRE,

    SOME OF THE OLD THE STINKING BU WOMEN WILL NOW COME AND DISPUTE THESE FACTS WITH THEIR “may be this and may be dat” BUT THESE ARE FACTS

    ALL THIS EVIL HAS BEEN AROUND FOR ABOUT 30-40 YEARS IN BARBADOS AND WAS FOSTERED BY ONE NASTY JAMAICAN FEMALE LAWYER AND THE PARTICULAR HIGH COURT JUDGE WHO COLLUDED WITH HER TO OBSTRUCT JUSTICE

    THESE ARE FACTS THATR CAN NOT BE REFUTED

  28. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    @Simple Simon, looka dis ting fuh muh! we can both agree at some times, nevertheless, in the interest of the children you women need to speak up on these issues as presented by the writer. You must put aside your personal feelings and look to what is best for the growth of the future generation. Be good!

  29. David Avatar
    David

    @GP

    The problem is much bigger. With no dedicated court to try family matters judges are not always sensitive to the kinds of issues that arise. It is painful if you were to discuss how courts frustrate men in the system. A pity the men’s forum is a useless organization.

  30. Mariposa Avatar
    Mariposa

    Yes agree that some woman can be spiteful and vindictive
    However cannot understand rationality of the Ministry getting involved in a family matter as adressed in the article that should be resolved in the court
    Doesn’t make sense

  31. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    David

    How do courts frustrates men in the system? If Bajan men allow Bajan women to outmaneuver them in court then they have to face the consequences …

    And now you are trying to blame the failure of men due to they lack of proper legal representation on the insensitivity of judges …who by the way are mostly men …

  32. David Avatar
    David

    @Lexicon

    You may have the last word.

  33. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    The ministers got involved when they brought that sexual harassment bill in the work place. Looking at what it takes to bring a child to adulthood, I don’t see why certain legislation can’t be in place with stiff penalties for those who transgress. Then again, this will be a law on the books that target women mostly.

  34. whiteHill Avatar
    whiteHill

    If you think this is his last word I got a bridge up there by him to sell you.

  35. Donna Avatar
    Donna

    There are spiteful men and there are spiteful women. Who can dispute that.? That is why we need a system to intervene. I know for a fact that some women use the children as weapons when the relationship breaks up. i know that some men deliberately abandon their children to spite women who end relationships with them.

    Why the relationships break up is a story for another day but I will say that we need to take more time in choosing mothers and fathers for our children. We must also secure a stable relationship before we procreate. And once we have procreated within that stable relationship we need to do our utmost to keep it stable. It is not easy to do but it does benefit us in the end. We have to rethink love and relationships and family. We are messed up! It is never too late to clean up a mess.

    But that is an ideal that will never be realized in total though it would behoove the organizations of both men and women to spend more time promoting these preventative measures rather than simply asserting rights.

    The system is as messed up as we the people are at present. Men get screwed with lack of access and in some instances women get screwed with child support. Some marshals cannot seem to find some delinquent fathers even though they live in the same spot for years. Other fathers who are trying their best get screwed by the courts.

    Enforcement of court judgments is as good as is enforcement of EVERYTHING ELSE IN THIS SOCIETY!

    And in the middle of this mess are the children. They will turn around and kick our old asses if we don’t get this crap cleaned up!

    And we would deserve it.

    I propose, Kammie that you reach out to women’s organizations and have discussions with them. Bring men and women together to talk to each other rather than at each other. People are acting out of emotion rather than reason. Make them pause and think and there could be change. Present a united front to the public. based on the understanding that it is to the benefit of us all.

    It seems that neither men nor women are particularly happy with relations as they are. Revenge is not as sweet as we think it is. When people take these unreasonable positions somebody should be there to ask – so how’s that working out for you? Are you happy now?

  36. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    Donna

    I do not understand how a government agency can deny a father the right to his child report card if he has sole custody of his child and give it to the child’s mother who does not ….

    I think the Ministry of Education has decided that since the child lives with the mother and since there is one report card that it should go to the mother rather than the father…

  37. Lexicon Avatar
    Lexicon

    And why would parents waste their time arguing over a child’s report card … when in this day and age we have what is known as Parents Teachers Conferences which keeps parents abreast of the children overall progress or lack thereof…?

  38. Wily Coyote Avatar
    Wily Coyote

    @Lexicon March 4, 2019 8:07 AM

    “where is the backbone of the Barbadian people”

    Good question, numerous of us have been wondering about this very issue for the last several years of rampant government corruption, do tell whats the answer.

  39. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    @Donna March 4, 2019 1:29 PM “i know that some men deliberately abandon their children to spite women who end relationships with them.”

    I generally agree with what you wrote at 1:29, but please remember that some men abandon their children not because the woman has ended the relationship, but because the man has found a woman he likes better and he abandons both the woman and their children.

    And yes some women do this too. They find a man that they like better.

    It goes both ways.

    And always the children are the ones victimized.

    Some stepmothers don’t want anybody else’s snotty, pissy, noisy children around them.

    Some stepfathers don’t want anybody else’s snotty, pissy, noisy children around them.

    Truth.

    Raising children is expensive, and it is hard work.

    Some men, some women just don’t want to do it.

  40. SirFuzzy (Former Sheep) Avatar
    SirFuzzy (Former Sheep)

    my two-cents worth on this man woman child mother court thng is the following view.

    Today too many men and women ae actively engaged in ‘TRANS-ACTION-SHIPS” as opposed to “RELATIONSHIPS”

    We as a society in large also approach the GOD (must be a bajan mantra) as a thing that looks like more of a “TRANSACTIONSHIP” as well. I am pretty sure he s not to impressed as GOd appears more interested in truth “obedience faith and Relationships”

    Just my take.

  41. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    @Who? “even the schools now saying they have received instructions that they cannot even show the fathers the school reports of their children per instructions from Ministry Of Education.”

    This doesn’t seem right to me. Once the father’s name is on the birth certificate, or once the man has a court order i see no reason that the school can’t procide a copy of the report to each parent.

    But we must be mindful that if John Brown turns up a a school and says that he is the father of little Sally Jones of little Bobby Green and there is no documentation, the school is right not to grant access to that child or the child’s records. Because the unknown man at the gate may not be the child’s parent at all.

    So I would advise my own son?

    Get your name on that birth certificate, and get your name on that marriage certificate also.

    Go to the school meetings regularly, so that the staff know you.

    Don’t be a stranger in your child’s life.

    Being an excellent parent to our children is the most important thing that most of us will ever do in our lives.

  42. SirFuzzy (Former Sheep) Avatar
    SirFuzzy (Former Sheep)

    We i read thing or scenarios where there is some family issues or disillusionment taking place. The often used phrase is “let do this or that for the children” “For the betterment of the children” etc. I have often have not heard for the “better” lets do this for the better outcome. Children Mother Father all need better outcomes not just the mother or father or children.

    All the players(pieces) on the chessboard need to work together for a better outcome(family and society). In our modern world we often lost the sight of the greater purpose of family and child rearing etc. Selfish societies produce selfish citizens which produce selfish infants and toddlers and primary school and secondary school or tertiary school graduates. These get married or not; and usually have babies etc. The purpose of life in these societies become a “transaction-ship” and the those that have real relationship are promoted or idealised but seldom followed as it the real relationship is seen as the exception rather than the rule. etc.

  43. SirFuzzy (Former Sheep) Avatar
    SirFuzzy (Former Sheep)

    if the male is the legal father of the child, and the female is the legal mother of the child. As far as i know there are the biological parents should have some parental rights .

    They both owe a duty of care to that child. Likewise the respective societal institutions have a certain duty of responsibility to each of them as it relates to the child.

    What is the issue with both parents seeing the report card? Solution; mail or send the report card to both of them. A sheet of stationery or the cost of stationery cannot surely be too much for a school to send to both of them. Send the original to the court appointed person and send a authorised duplicate to the other. Problem solved, unless they MoE or actors in the judicial ecosystem wants prolong this beyond a common sense ending.

    I wonder; if the child were injured will the MOH(QEH) say that the child’s mother or father cannot visit the ailing child in the hospital or attend a medical consultation on the child’s health?

    Just asking

  44. millerthe anunnaki Avatar
    millerthe anunnaki

    @ SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife March 4, 2019 8:45 PM
    “Get your name on that birth certificate, and get your name on that marriage certificate also.”
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Lady President for Life, can you tell us in which era of Bajan family life was your advice ever considered the norm in Bajan society in which 70 % of mainly black babies are born to the “child-mothers” of men without names?

    Instead of advising your ‘well-bred’ son, why don’t you advise the university-educated women to have children from the ‘ideal’ sperm-bank depositors and the ghetto girls to learn to spell the nicknames of their baby-fathers before they lie down to bed and ‘breed (Oh, what a ‘vulva’ English word!) for the lost-cause bad boys with dosh earned in the illicit drug business?

    Why not teach, in the ‘ghetto’ schools, those ‘poor innocent’ girl children about tubal litigation instead of condoms on TV?

  45. 555dubstreet Avatar
    555dubstreet

    “I’m the father of this gangster shit
    you know my style and colt
    go file a report

    I’m a dead beat daddy
    you want child support
    get it out your ass bitch”
    — ice cube

    The cheapest quickest and easiest without-fail solution for fathers to have access to their children is thus

    => stop working have no income and give no money to the Ex

    the children will be dropped off at the father’s house for him to look after within a month or two as soon as the Ex realises that there is no more money coming in to support her (which should be spent on children and not herself anyhow)

  46. SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife Avatar
    SirSimpleSimonPresidentForLife

    @555dubstreet March 6, 2019 4:59 PM

    Nope.

    it won’t work like that.

    The mother will continue working, ot go to work.

    Her mother (and perhaps yours) and her sisters, and perhaps her decent father or stepfather will chip in to raise YOUR children.

    Most of the children will turn out well.

    Although you may live to see your son in handcuffs on the front page of the newspaper.

    And when you are dead your sorry old @ss will remain at the morgue, unloved and unclaimed for a year or more.

  47. 555dubstreet Avatar
    555dubstreet

    Simple simon you subscribe to the nursery rhyme that Family Courts are based on

    Little girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice

    Snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails, that’s what little boys are made of

    Kids can work out who was to blame for conflict and stop talking to mum when they reach 18

    Woman want money

    Woman are selfish and damage the children’s development

    Grandparents step in to help the Grandchildren

  48. 555dubstreet Avatar
    555dubstreet

    Judges don’t even bother to read Court Statements filed when making decisions

    Lawyers want to stir up conflict so they can buy a new car

    Judges decisions are made on basis of probability with a guess that women are better than the men in just over 50% of the time

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